There’s no way it’s that time.
It can’t be 8:55am. My alarm was set for…. Wait. Did I forget to set a… OH SH*T, I GOTTA GO.
Yes, we’ve all been here. And we’re here to help.
Don’t worry we got the best for you ladies and the best for you gentlemen (or gentle boys if you’re still showing up to meetings late).
Best Excuses If You’re Late To Your First Meeting (Girls):
- The drive through line at Starbucks was sooooooooooo long.
Heaven forbid you actually get out of your car and wait in line in the actual store.
- The *insert freeway here* on ramp was closed.
Instead of just taking the 55 to the 5, you have to take the 55 to the 405 to the 22 to the 5 (or something ridiculous like that). Screw this, I’m going back to Washington.
- I had nothing to wear out of my three closets and Nordstrom doesn’t open until 9:30.
Heaven forbid I repeat an outfit people, let’s get our priorities straight!
- My car wouldn’t start and the AAA guy was cute.
He was like a cross between Adam Levine and Chris Evans (YUM), so I HAD to take my time.
Best Excuses If You’re Late To Your First Meeting (Guys)
- Mom forgot to do my laundry.
Ugh, second time this month!
- Mom didn’t have my breakfast ready in time.
Sorry I like my bacon crispy.
- I had to Google how to tie a tie (three times).
Okay maybe it was the fourth or fifth video that I finally figured it out. Whatever.
- I cut myself shaving.
I couldn’t decide how much to trim and I think I hit my jugular doing it and may be bleeding out.
- I lost my nice shoes.
The last time I wore them was cousin Charlie’s wedding… In 2010…
Obviously if these don’t work for you you’re a little rusty on your sales technique. Hell, when I told the teacher the dog ate my homework, I was so persuasive she was buying training for my dog like it was her job. So if you can’t get these to work I call “user error.”
Oh, and get a new alarm clock.